There's A Light

I have been through some things in my life, and bounced back pretty hard. The only thing that I can't mentally process, is death. It never manage's to set in to me that the person that I love is gone. Today, I went to go visit the resting place of one of my closest friends Jacki. There was a point in my life, where I felt so alone and she was there for me.

So, I never went a grave before and it was an experience for me. To feel the emotion that I felt today was something very new to me. I felt the urge to cry, I felt the emotions of tears, but they didn't come. There was more of a flutter, more of a pull. I felt drawn to it. I know I am not making sense right now, but I am just typing as I feel.

She was one of the most important people in my life and I still can't fathom she is gone. I need to go see her more, I need to talk about her more. It is through those memories that I can keep her alive and I haven't done a very good job @ that.

I am sorry Jacki. I love you and miss you.